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So many questions are needing answered...
Written at 1:06 a.m. on Wednesday, Dec. 11, 2002

So I met "MrBigDaddy" at the local sports bar after work.

He was already there when I pulled up. When I got out of my car, he came up and gave me this hug that just engulfed me. Me being 5'6 and him being something like 6'2...yeah, it engulfed me.

We went in and grabbed a table...the same table we always get when we go there. I noticed that he went up to the bar and ordered a pitcher of beer...with two glasses. After "MrLightening" being the total SpongeBob that he is, it was nice for someone else to pay for a change. Its not about me expecting someone to pay for everything. Its just nice to be reciprocated now and then.

And that is the way that "MrBigDaddy" is. One night months back "MrGIjoe", "Downstairsgirl" and I met up with him for happy hour at this place. We drank and ate and drank some more. And at the end of the night, he footed the entire was about $100. He didnt have to, but he did.

So tonight was fun. We pretty much just played pool and talked. We took many trips down memory lane. It was kinda nice. At one point in the night, he told me that he thinks the reason that it didnt work with us is because at the time we were working together. If you ask me, it was because he was, umm, still living with his ex-girlfriend at the time. They werent together as a couple, but they were still living together for the kids. That was the whole of our undoing.

At the end of the night, we ended up sitting in my car talking. We got to talking about birthdays. He remembered my birthday was in September but didnt remember the day. Then he asked me how old I was and guessed 27 (Ugh, he was right!). Then he said he was just checking to make sure he wasnt dating some young girl. Are we dating? Why didnt anyone tell me? Did I miss yet another memo? I am going to have to speak to management about this one. Then...he...kissed me.

Thankfully, a phone call from "Ms2inchman" broke up the awkwardness there. He asked me what I was doing tomorrow after work and said that he would call me when he gets off.

What am I doing? What is he doing? What is going on here? I am just not sure about all this. I mean, he is a wonderful person with whom I simply adore. BUT, it didnt work out the first time around...why would this be any different? And when we finally agreed to be just friends, we were great friends. Does he have an alterior motive here? What is it?

I am just not sure. When I asked for someone to come along and take my mind off of "MrLightening", this is totally not what I had expected.