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I'll find someone else, who's nothing like you...two can play the game as well, and you're gonna be sorry baby...when its over!
Written at 9:02 p.m. on Tuesday, Feb. 04, 2003

Ok, its now time to put out the fire. A person can only get burned so many times...for me, this was the last time.

I refuse to walk around with the big scarlet "S" on my chest. "S" standing for sucker. Because right now that is exactly how I feel. Like I was the biggest idiot in the make that the universe.

I have had my suspicions from the beginning that if "MrBigDaddy" werent in the situation that he is in, he wouldnt have even ventured back into my life. I think I looked like the easy answer. He needed a place to stay and oh, look...I had one. It came with a fridge always full of beer, an endless supply of cigarettes and all the sex he wanted. He didnt work and he didnt pay rent either. He had a good deal here. Man, was I stupid or what?

Its my fault for taking a friendship and trying to turn it into a relationship. It didnt work the first time and at that time I realized we were better off just being friends. But I seriously thought that this time I could make things work out. Apparently, I couldnt.

I was sitting here beating myself up about this, asking myself why I didnt see this coming. And "MrGIjoe" popped on my messenger. He asked if I was okay. He said, "The only bad out come of any situation is if you don't learn from it."

So now I am going to go outside and smoke a cigarette. And when I come back in, I am going to start packing his stuff up for him.

I dont know when I will see or hear from him again, but whenever that is, it will be waiting for him.