Hello again, your words they make me smile...as I drift away in my little room upstairs
Written at 9:08 a.m. on Friday, May. 16, 2003
First, I need to comment (or add on) to a guestbook and diary entry from Jo . She wrote an amazingly, beautiful (and accurately true) poem about Friends without Faces.
Its ironic because I was just thinking about that the other day. About how some of you, here from Diaryland, have become much more to me than I ever thought a "Nameless Face" could ever be.
When I'm feeling hopeless or depressed, its the notes and guestbook entries that have a way of brightening my mood. The notes of encouragement and support mean more to me than I can express in mere words. I love that when I have a problem or dilema, I can find a sounding board here.
I know this sounds awfully sappy, but I cant help it. I'm cheesy like that. I guess I just wanted to say thank you back.
I dont know, I've had this very clear, crisp consciousness over the last few days. I cant explain it. Its almost like stepping out of a fog and seeing what's around you as if you've never seen it before. Like you never knew it was there before.
Its about forcing those pieces to fit and making things fall into place. I dont claim to have it all figured out yet, but I'm working on it. Which says alot, because I've always been the kind of person to wait for things to happen instead of going out and making them happen.
I look at my life and although I complain alot about all the things that are wrong with it, there is alot of beauty in it as well. More beauty than I've ever noticed. I really have no room to complain. We all hit bumps in the road from time to time...I'm no different.
I have so much to be grateful for, really I do. And I often feel I'm not appreciative enough for all that I have. It could always be worse and I need to keep reminding myself that. I came from no where. I had nothing. And now I have alot more than I ever imagined I would.
I guess I just looked back on one of my entries where I'm way too self-pitying and I just thought to myself What the hell are you complaining about? You have no right. Stupid girl, there's people out there way worse off than you are. Another thing I have to keep reminding myself.
No one is any better or worse...just different.