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Traveling down this road, watching the signs as I go...I think I'll follow the sun
Written at 9:31 a.m. on Monday, May. 19, 2003

The power of thought is a strong thing.

I called my grandmother yesterday since it was her birthday. She and I started talking about my trip back there last Christmas. Then out of no where, he says Lets move back there. I thought he was kidding, so I asked him again this morning and he said he would.

He said that he would go and see if he likes it there. That was alot more than I expected from him.

He's going through this sort of metamorphosis right now as well. It has me nervous yet slightly curious at the same time.

He's really wanting to work at making a good life for himself. You know, do all of the things he should have been doing years ago instead of partying and producing more kids. Yesterday, he even asked if I would start going to church with him. Part of me still thinks he's kidding about that, but he says that he isnt. Its just surprising being as he's always considered himself an athiest. To each his own, right.

I can really see a difference in him. He's starting to care about what lies in the road ahead of him, instead of just trudging ahead with no regard to anything. Hmmm, I think he may finally be growing up.

Last night we watched Swordfish. One little sub-plot of the movie is about how the main character is trying to get his daughter back. One scene in the movie, they are sitting in the car and she's telling him how much she loves him and how much she's missed him. I know it was hard for him to watch that. I can see the pain in his eyes when he thinks about his kids or when we go out and he sees a father out with his daughter. I know it hurts him.

I wish for his birthday there was a way that I could find his kids for him. I know that's the hardest part of it all for him...not knowing. He has no idea where they are. That would eat at me too.

Things between us are really good right now...

...about time!