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Written at 12:14 p.m. on Saturday, Jan. 29, 2005

Yesterday I broike down and went to see the neurologist. And I dont say "broke down" like I had this great epiphany to go, but rather if I wanted any refills on my perscription I'd have to "break down" and go.

I waited an hour waiting for the doctor to see me. I finally was called back and was poked and prodded in places that I didnt even think I had. She tested my balance, strength, reflexes...stuff like that. She thinks that the scars in my brain are in the back of my brain, the sensory part, because she thinks my motor function is perfect...very good balance, great co-ordination and awesome reflexes. That makes me happy, so very happy.

She did, however, want to send me for another MRI and a new set of tests called an ENG...Electro Nuerological something. She said it was something like electrodes on my head and exposing me to light and seeing how it travels in my eyes and brain...or something like that. I tjink she was going to ask me to get a spinal tap as well. That was until I quickly cut her off and said that I refuse to get one. You get a spinal tap to get a diagnosis...and that I already have. Thanks, but no thanks.

She also mentioned my hands. My hands hurt and are always numb and tingly. She seems to think its mild carpal tunnel. So now I get to sleep in these nice, cute glove thingies. Whatever...I'll try anything.

SO I am a little anxious to get a new set of MRI's done. I am, however, not so anxious to sit in that little coffin-like tunnel for another two hours again. I get severely claustrophobic in there. But I keep hoping that I may get some good news on this in comparison from my MRI almost three years ago, that I have less scar tissue. Or better yet, that I was misdiagnosed and that I dont have MS at all. But I'm not going to disillusion myself in any way.

A girl can dream though.