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The lessons were all learned...my soul has charred what they burned
Written at 6:31 p.m. on Saturday, Apr. 09, 2005

The gods have a away of knowing...they just do. Whenever I'm feeling down and need my friends...there they are in full uniform ready to pull me out of whatever it is that I've fallen into.

Angel...she's my rock, man. She's the only one, when I was at a very low point in my life just about to turn a corner, that befriended me with no strings attached. She's this beautiful friendship that I wont ever let go of. Even though she's in Texas now, she has a way of picking up the phone and calling me and making me feel so much better. She's my Angel. She called me the other day and just made my day inside and out.

Romy...she called me today, "Hi, Doodlebug. I just wanted to call and see what you are doing. Me and my daughter are down the street from your house at my mom's and I wanted to know if we could stop by". Of course, anytime. So they should be here soon.

Lauren...called me about 15 minutes ago. "I really want to see you and have a girl's night this week. I have had the week from hell and could really use it." Of course! Thank gawd for girl's night.

My friends will always mean so much more to me than any man ever could...ever will. Thay just have this "sixth sense" and know when I need them...and when I need them to need me in return. They are awesome.

So its only Saturday...and my upcoming week is already full. Monday...dinner with Monique and a family friend. Tuesday...a friend may come up fromm Temecula to go have drinks and hang out. Wednesday...the gym with my co-worker. Thursday...well, Thursdays are always the same yet different...my shot = Tracey goes nowhere. Friday...dinner and Netflix with Lauren at my house. YaY! i LOVE THIS.

I was up last night until 6 am. I was up talking to Matt. Mostly about how contrary to popular belief, I dont hate him yet I dont want to be his friend either. It was mostly alot of tears on both ends with some yelling and accusitions in between. And there's my reassurance right there. Why I have close the door and lock it behind me.

That's ironic because Chris called me last night. Again, asking me if he can get me a plane ticket to come to Hawaii. He also asked me to not close the door on us. For now...I agreed, but a girl cant wait forever. And wont. Hurry up.

So tonight, I am going to hang at home. Drink some wine, watch some movies, stuff like that.

Life's not too bad today...it just kinda evened itself out.

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