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I needed somewhere to hang my head without your noose...you gave me something that I didnt have, but had no use
Written at 4:57 a.m. on Saturday, May. 27, 2006

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. And I'm not talking about a Tale of Two Cities either.

Becca met me at my house after work. We planned on meeting Tony and his friend at the pool hall. We got there and sat outside talking to them. After a while I realized that we were at a pool hall and noone was playing pool. And I was sitting out on their patio watching the three of them drink and smoke. Neither of which I do.

I mentioned going to "Cheers". Which of course caused Tony to get this disgusted look on his face followed by a bunch of why's. I was bored. Out of my mind. Becca finally said If you want to hang out with Tracey tonight, you are just going to have to do what she wants. I'm not sure if that was her way of helping me talk him into it or calling me a bitch. I think it was the latter of the two. Either way, he finally agreed to go.

We ended up taking two cars. When we pulled up Becca told me that I was being a bitch. How I had this wonderful guy who really liked me and I was treating him like shit. So I went inside in a totally different mindset. I was determined to be nice. The guys came in with a different attitude too. Come to find out that was because they did some Meth before they got there. Just great. That changed/erased any chance he had. I'm trying to get my life in order. Get things right again. I dont need one more person walking into it and fucking things up. And I just dont do that stuff.

I ended up spending a good portion of the night at the table alone because the guys wanted to go out and smoke cigarettes every five minutes. So while I was sitting there a guy walking by sat down and started talking to me. That was until Tony walked in and said You think I can get my chair back? Only to turn right around and go back outside to smoke again. By this time, I was irritated. His friend, Becca's date, was paying more attention to me than he was.

Oooh, her date. I have to give him props. He was a total hottie. But he had very little tact. He wanted Becca and me to go home with him...big bed style. Not happening. At all. And if I were her, I would've been pissed. He hugged her and whispered, loudly mind you, You're so sexy in her ear. Then he hugged me and said You too, ooh, you too. I like you. Apparently that wasnt enough. She still took him home with her.

When they left I sat out on the benches with "DownstairsGirl". That was until two guys sat down and sandwiched us in between them. She got the quiet one. I got the one that was drunk and kept trying to take off my glasses and stroke my hair. He kept trying to hold my hands commenting on how soft they are. Which coinsidentally is what Becca's date was saying earlier.

After the bar closed, "DownsairsGirl" and I sat outside trying to sober her up enough to drive home. There were cops everywhere and I'm just a good friend like that. I wasnt going to let her attempt to drive home. She was well beyond the legal limit. We sat there after everyone left. Even long after the employees that stay behind to clean up.

I learned one thing tonight. Bars = drunk people...drunk people = not so much a fun time when they're bugging the shit out of me. So I think I'm going to put bars back on the top shelf and not play with it for a while. I did agree to go back there with "DownstairsGirl" Sunday night to pick something up from one of the bartenders. But that's about it. I'm not going to stay all night.

It was more of the worst of times tonight. The best of times are going to come...right?

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