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Written at 2:57 p.m. on Thursday, Jul. 26, 2007

I have sao much to say...but no comprehensible words seem to come out.

Small recap...Becca had her son (Gavin)...I just came back from a 3 day trip to my corporate office.

Enough recap...elaborations to follow in another entry.

This afternoon was bad. I am at work having one of the worst days I've had here. I decided to spend my lunch here with the phones off checking my email. A long time ago I had signed up with a friend for an online dating thing...and today I got a message on there from Matt. It literally crippled me at the knees to open the email. At first I didnt know it was him. The person had the same name...age...and lives in the same city. I just thought it was a strange coinsidence. Up until he called me and said something about it.

I just want to be done with this part of my life. It just feels like a haunting that doesnt end. How exactly do you lay a ghost to rest? Especially one that doesnt seem to want to cross over.

I am so sick to my stomache right now it hurts. I just want to throw up.