It's alright...I'm ok...
Written at 10:05 a.m. on Saturday, Apr. 25, 2009
I am so glad that this week is over...and I only worked 3 out of 5 days. An entire work week may possibly kill me.
The job isnt that bad. The drive back and forth, however, is a different story. It takes me on average about an hour and fifteen minutes to get there. In the morning its not that bad. Kinda relaxing. Its mostly back roads with one lane in each direction. Its when I get to the 70 that I get unhinged. If I am driving in a 65...and going 85...noone should be riding my ass like I am standing still. Go around if theyre in that much of a hurry. I dont get it.
So this job...aside from the drive...is ok...for now. Its really just me and another girl in the office all day. A little on the boring side. But its a paycheck so I will shut up now. It could be worse...I could be out running from city hall to city hall like I will be eventually.
My aunt came and met me for lunch yesterday. She showed up and wanted to put some things in my car. Little did I know it was an entire meal...for days. A chicken...four sides...a strawberry cake...a bottle of pinot grigio wine...the whole nine. She is too sweet. I think I am going to have it tonight.
I still really havent been dating anyone or even really talking to anyone...not like that. Kinda sucks...but its ok for now.
I think part of the uneasy feeling is partially to do with a conversation with "Little Mike" and another guy I was talking to a month or so back. They both leave me a little perplexed.
When I talked to "Little Mike" the other day we were talking about what we've both been up to since we havent talked for a while. I made a comment about how I wasnt going to call at 1am like I did before accidentally. He made some little comment about a girlfriend. I didnt pay too much attention to it. And he made another little comment about a girlfriend. Finally when he realized that I wasnt going to respond to his comments, he said I have a girlfriend. Really? I wasnt picking up on that. Its hard to explain...but have you ever had someone who really wanted you to know something because they wanted to see how you would respond? Thats kind of how it was talking with him. In a roundabout way, it was like...I am off the market...I have a girlfriend...she knows I'm not going anywhere. As if I was insinuating anything. Nope...still not feeling it for this guy. He thought it would make me feel something...but I still dont feel anything. I see what he was trying to do. He wanted me to realize what I could have had. I'm good...thanks.
Then last night I got an instant message from this guy Kevin. Kevin is a guy that I was talking to that took off at full speed and I wasnt onboard. If I told him I'd call him tomorrow, by 12 noon he was texting me telling me how I was a bad person because I said I would call him and I didnt. Tomorrow is a 24-hour time frame. It doesnt turn into the day-after tomorrow at noon, silly boy. What it was with Kevin is he wanted too much, too soon. And that is always a turn-off with me. I want to get to know someone before planning any kind of future. So Kevin sends me this IM yesterday telling me how he met the girl of his dreams and they are getting married...and how he hope that I find the same. Mind you...Kevin and I were talking ONLY a month ago. I would never agree to marry someone that soon. Fortunately, I was asleep when he sent the message...so I wasnt able to respond. Because I know that the smartass, cynical person in me would have said some shit and felt bad later about it. You just dont know someone after a month. A month? That is only 30 days. Not enough time for me. Maybe that is just me though.
I do have plans with someone, NOT named Mike, tonight. It is a Tom though...but not THAT Tom. Its just dinner. My gawd, I am hoping that not too much can go wrong there.
I did talk to "New Mike" the other day. I had left him a message and he called me back later that night. Something about how he's glad that I called because he was bathing his son the other night and his phone fell in and he lost my number. Sure. Maybe I dont have it in me to date because I call Bullshit way too much. Whatever. Because I see around little incidentals like that. He has my email...could have sent an email. Perhaps its just me.
I think I need to go back to bed and start this day over again.