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So while you're outside looking in...describing what you see...remember what you're staring at is me...
Written at 12:46 p.m. on Tuesday, Oct. 06, 2009

It's been a fun past few days.

So Thursday night, I met up with a friend from high school and her 7 year old daughter to go to dinner and a movie. We went and saw Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs. Cute movie. It had been graduation since I had seen her. And we were like best friends in high school. She even reminded me of the night that we lied to our parents and stayed the night at Tom's house, unbeknownst to his dad, and slept in his dead grandmother's room. Yes...she knew Tom. We were close.

So I forget what point it was...either at the restaurant or on the drive home...we started talking. Life...stuff like that. I made a joke about how you would think that I am agoraphobic based on how often I really get out. I guess it's really not funny if you are someone on the outside looking in...you'd think it was sad. She responded...That's funny because of how you were in high school...you were always right there front and center...so much of an extrovert. And she is right. I was NOT the quiet one in the group in high school...probably the loudest. Now, I've learned to quiet down a little...but I'm not in a group anymore...I am in an apartment ALL THE TIME ALONE. Existing...but not living.

So on the drive home, we started talking again and she said something about being sick and being self-conscious about it. She was telling me how I needed to not care and just get me ass back out there in life. It's not like I dont hear it from Jason and Josh all the time. And this girl really knew me when I was a fun girl to hang out with. So what she says means alot to me.

Friday, I decided to go out. I met up with my friend Kevin for dinner. We played some pool and had some fun. Was nie to get out.

Saturday morning I woke up with a huge urgency to get out of here. Unfortunately I didnt get a hold of Patty early enough or I would have gone to her house. She really want me to meet her friend Danny and we have been talking all week bout getting together. So we all made plans for Sunday.

Yes, I travelled outside of my comfort zone. I drove over two hours, a few bridges, and hung out at the eastern shore for a couple of days. The drive was amazing. Except for the toll the I unintentionally ran on the Bay Bridge because I was accidentally in the EZpass lane. oh, well. I am expecting something to come in the mail about that.

I got to her house and sat there talking to her for a while. Danny called my cell at one point asking if I was there yet. So he would know to head over. He really is a wonderful guy. He treated me so nice the entire time. Again, I know how hypocritical this sounds...but I would definately date him...if...he were a little thinner. I know how bad that sounds, but I cant seem to get around it. There are numerous reason...I dont want to go back to that weight ever again...I would worry about his health...sex would be impossible. Those are just a few. But he, aside from that, is extremely good looking...and he has this amazing personality that is incredible.

I was invited back up again this weekend by Patty, Danny, and one of Danny's friends.

I just dont know where to go with this.

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Official Stone Sour "Through Glass"
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