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This house is not a home without you, it takes two hearts to share
Written at 2:46 p.m. on Tuesday, Mar. 11, 2003

People always say that they pick and choose their battles. But how do you decide which ones are worth standing behind what you believe and which ones you will just have to bite your tongue on?

As the time draws closer, I get more frantic. Because I just dont know if living together is going to work for me anymore.

He has made a few comments about wanting to rent the extra room from me once "MsMoHoney" leaves. He says that he only wants to rent it for a place to put his stuff and an extra room if he decides to take his kids. My point is, why cant we both just live here like its "our" house. No boundaries. No my room, your room. Just two people in a relationship together sharing a two bedroom apartment.

He says that he will still be staying in my room and that things wont be any different. But I cant get past the principal of it all.

So I am left with the dilema of rocking the boat when things will pretty much be the same as they are already. OR...standing firm behind my desire to have a house together and not have it divided in spirit.

Because I dont want him to leave. I love living with him. But I dont need a roommate, I need a boyfriend in every definition of the word. It is a security factor with me.

I am standing at this intersection and I just dont know which way to go. Because I cant tell which one is the dead end road.