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I hear the secrets that you keep, when you're talking in your sleep
Written at 8:58 a.m. on Wednesday, Jan. 29, 2003

I had the most bizaar dreams last night. I can only remember bits and pieces of it.

I was in an(my?) apartment hanging out with "MrBackSeatDriver" and we were playing video games. All of the sudden he left to go to the store, but he came back. When he came back we were playing video games with some little blonde boy. After a while, we headed up to my room, but by this time there were so many people in the apartment.

Then I was driving and talking on the phone to "MrBigDaddy". I remember in my dream I was crying. And I clearly remember saying to him "You dont love me. Will you please let me go. All you are doing is holding me back".

And I kept driving because I knew where he was at. For some reason he was at my aunt's house where she was having a party. When I got there, I found him sitting at a table by himself. I walked out there with two drinks in my hand and just guzzled them down. Then I walked away from him.

I went up to the room that I was staying in. I found "MrCurioiusGeorge" there playing on my computer. I walked away from him too.

Freud would have a blast with me. What does all of this mean?

Funny thing is when I woke up this morning, "MrBigDaddy" said that I had been talking in my sleep but it was nothing that he could make out.

I think I know what these dreams mean, but I am not ready to admit it to myself yet.